How Insurrections Start

At the safety meeting this week, one of the managers announced that the light breakfast setup -- doughnuts, biscuits, and fruit -- was going to change to something more health-conscious.  Yogurt and granola, maybe.

In the break room this morning, there was discussion that we may have seen our last sausage biscuit.  An engineer predicted that the people would rise up, in two ways -- either by bringing their own biscuits in protest (especially in very noisy paper bags), or by not attending the safety meetings at all, as they are routinely taped and made available later.

"I'll just be back in my cubicle, in a horribly unergonomic position, watching the video off the website while I eat my biscuit,"  he said.  "Jeff will be speaking to an empty room … " 

"… just like C-SPAN," another finished.  "The senator, the recorder, and the camera."

Another disagreed on the biscuit, but said the doughnuts were probably history.  He said we'd likely see bagels, which prompted observations that for those on a low carb diet rather than low fat, the bagel is no improvement over a doughnut, and we'd do better to eat blocks of cream cheese, skip the bagel, and suck down a latte with 23 grams of fat as a chaser.

Such is the life of principle in the office world.  Some things just can't be trifled with.